I only have a passing interest in the Premier League. I don’t watch it, I don’t really care about it. But I keep a passing eye on the scores occasionally.

And one thing I’ve noticed, year in year out, since Fergie left, is that Man Utd always seem to be losing.

LATE BRIGHTON WINNER SINKS MAN UTD. All that sort of stuff. I read it all the time. Any time I check the scores, Man Utd have lost.

But then I go and check the table, and Man Utd are third. Or fourth. Or sometimes, SECOND. And I don’t get how it works.

It’s like there’s some weird backwards Law of Football that ensures that Man Utd are always sort of around the top, even if they lose every game. We’ll just chuck ‘em a couple of points, here and there, to keep them in the race.

I really hope this is a universal experience. Otherwise this is a terrible introduction.

But the relevance here is: Wimborne Town are doing an absolute Anti-Man-Utd.

Because how on earth is this team 9th?

They’re unbeaten in their last 7 league games (13 in all competitions).

On Saturday they decided to be nice and let Havant & Waterlooville have the ball for a little while, and even get a couple of late goals against them.

When they were already 6-1 up.

Before that, they hadn’t conceded a league goal since 15th August – a 1-1 draw at home to Gloucester City.

For those of you who struggle to fully comprehend the mystery of time; in the time between them conceding a goal against Gloucester and a goal against Havant & Waterlooville, I…

Served a two week medical suspension from work, went back to work, went on holiday to the Isle of Wight, went on holiday to Finlake, celebrated my wife’s birthday, signed up for a £51 a month leisure centre membership, became obsessed with badminton, became obsessed with squash, taught my wife to play squash, had three GP appointments, became a Buddhist, and then gave up Buddhism.

Perhaps even more worrying than their dislike of conceding goals, is their love of scoring them. Ten goals in their last two league fixtures alone; the aforementioned 6-3 drubbing at the weekend, preceded by a 4-0 win over Yate Town.

Four of the six goals scored at the weekend came from Angel Francisco Diaz Villa, who should, of course, be congratulated on his incredible feat, as well as his incredible name. These goals are the only goals to have been scored by Diaz Villa in his paltry three appearances this season. Why he has only made three appearances is as much a mystery as why he apparently seems to despise Havant & Waterlooville so much.

Fear not, however, for Parkway have a goalscoring threat of their own, also with a great name. Mr Rocky Neal is now up to ten goals in ten games after bagging another one against Chichester at the weekend.

The less said about that game the better. But Rocky Neal scored again, so it’s all good.

Parkway don’t boast too bad of a record themselves this season, as their third place position shows. They are the league’s top scorers with 24 from their first 10, and have picked up six wins, two draws, and two losses.

They’ll be desperate to win this one – obviously. A) because they’re footballers and B) because they’ve started to look a little less invincible in their last couple of league games, and they’ll want to put that right.

There was, of course, the 3-1 defeat away to Chichester on Saturday and, before that, the heartbreaking late goal away at Gloucester to level the scores and leave Parkway driving home with a single point.

Sandwiched between these fixtures, though, was the outstanding FA Cup victory over National League South side Horsham FC, which leaves Parkway now just one win from the first round proper.

But if we’re including cup games, we also have to mention the 3-0 spanking at home to Bath City in the FA Trophy at the end of September.

It’s all about perspective:

Parkway have won one of their last four in all competitions.

Or Parkway have won eight of their last eleven in all competitions.

I’ll stick with the latter.

It’s going to be a better game, and a tighter game, than league position alone suggests.

Parkway Vs Wimborne, Tuesday night, under the lights. Bolitho Park.

Angel Francisco Diaz Villa is making me nervous, but Rocky Neal is making everybody nervous.